Effing A.

This is where I really remember why I gave up on dating. Remember the 'butterflies'? Yeah. Right. Gone. You know, girls aren't something guys can just use for sex. We're living, breathing, and we have feelings. Funny, I know, if you know me. But it just pisses me off. Why string a girl along with all the cute little notions that you're into her, when you really aren't? If you're just looking for casual sex, you should say so first.. This goes for women, too! I'll bet there are just as many women out there, as men, who do this.

But it's alright, revenge is a sweet, sweet thing... Plus, it's making me $60. Can't complain there. I have other options, I know, but it would have been nice to not be used once in awhile. I mean, I technically did this to myself. I saw it coming, but didn't do much to stop it. So, if anything, I'm really just mad at myself, not at the guy that I'm letting get to me.

It's not so bad, though. I just kind of wonder where you'd think it's okay to piss off a person as badly as I've been... Knowing that they'd made their name ruining lives, and sending people off the edge. I admit I'm not perfect- I'm probably the most horrible person I've ever known. But I'm perfectly okay with that.

All in all, I want to believe that there's still somebody worth wasting my affection on out there... But so far, I really feel like it's best kept all to myself. Looks like I'll just be lathering it all over my dog, and my rats, for now. No use in lamenting over stupid bullshit like this. Just move on, the same as I always do. Like my sister says, 'Don't Tell Tom would say there's plenty of other fish in the hottub out back.' Now, if only I had a fuckin' hot tub.